Changes

I haven't made any progress on my resolutions. I've been a bit distracted lately. We're remodeling our kitchen, trying to put a nursery together (on hold because we had to put a lot of kitchen stuff in the nursery), and I'm navigating the trickiness of teaching online. And I'm about to give birth. Any moment now.

I went to my OB on Monday, and I'm about 3cm dilated. My blood pressure has been a little high, so she said she doesn't want me to go past my due date (March 15th). If I don't go into labor naturally, they're going to induce me. Wonderful. I'm very uncomfortable today -- achy back, belly feels very heavy, slightly crampy -- so I'm kind of hoping today is the day. I'm scared, but ready to get it over with. I've been carrying this little guy around for 9 months, and I just want to meet him already!

I am so ready for spring. Now that most of the snow has melted, there are daffodils and tulips peeking up from the ground. I've started some veggie seedlings (tomatoes, peppers, and various other things), and have ordered some new books on preserving in preparation for the summer.

Today, I'm focusing on teaching, laundry, and packing my bag (no, I haven't done that yet). In fact, I should get to the teaching part now. I have mid-terms to grade, and content to post. Good times.

2010 Goals/Resolutions

This is probably the first year in a long time that I don't have a resolution to lose weight. Feels good!

Here is my list of things I want to accomplish in 2010 (in no particular order):

· Make own butter, yogurt, mayonnaise

· Make own cheese – mozzarella to start

· Learn how to knit

· Learn how to needlepoint

· Make own whole wheat pitas for Chad’s lunches

· Make own white bread

· Once baby can eat solids, make own baby food

· Once spring arrives, dry all laundry outside

· Read 60 books

· Eat out only once per week

· Make at least three vegetarian meals per week

· Kitchen sink must be clear by bedtime every night

· Source & start using only local meat and produce

· From May-September, only local & homegrown produce

· Eliminate use of products with HFCS by end of the year

· Cut monthly grocery bills by 10%

· Use reusable bags when shopping

Snowy New Year's Eve

Woke up to snow this morning, which was somewhat of a surprise. They'd been forecasting flurries and such, but there's about 3 or 4 inches on the ground right now.

The holidays were nice, but, as always, went by too fast. Spent some time with the family and the husband, and that's really what the holidays are about for me, not the gifts. Life is a gift. Family is a gift.

I'm a bit melancholy today, as I always am on New Year's Eve. I've been reflecting on the past year, and how much, as always, things have changed. A year ago, I was not a happy person. Life wasn't horrible, but I wasn't able to appreciate what I had. Now, I'm happy and able to see how incredibly lucky I am. I have a husband whom I love with all my heart, and who is just...such a good man. I have a family whom I adore, and love to spend time with. I have a great career, good friends, my cats. What more could I ask for?

I'm still working on my resolutions, so I'll post them later. For now, I'm going to enjoy the snow day and read until I have to pick up the husband from work (his car is horrible in the snow).

Today would have been John Denver's 66th birthday. He was Emerson's favorite singer. Yes, that makes me sound like a crazy cat lady, but it's true. When I played John Denver's songs, Emerson would purr like crazy. I can't believe he's been gone almost a year. I miss him very much. I like to think that he's hanging out with John Denver wherever he is.

Finals

After having most of last week "off" from school (still had grading to do, but didn't have finals to administer), I'm giving finals today and tomorrow. It's easy enough -- I just sit here with my laptop and poke around the internet (no Facebook, though, as it's blocked) -- but I'd rather be home. I wasn't nearly productive enough last week, and have a lot to do before the holiday.

I haven't sent out Christmas cards yet, and may just do it after the holiday. I wanted to write notes to everyone, and I'll have time to do that after Friday. The next couple of days will be filled with finals, grading, baking, and sleep.

My sleep schedule has been screwy the past few weeks. No matter what time I go to bed (typically 10-11pm), I'm awake at 3am. It's either due to hip pain (I can only sleep on my side), the urge to pee (seriously annoying), or just general insomnia. Sometimes I can fall back asleep, but most of the time I can't. So I just get up and watch tv. I'm too sleepy to do anything that requires focus, so it's not like I use the extra time to get things done. Oh well.

I'm on campus until 2ish, then I have to go home and bake. I'm giving baskets of baked goodies to my colleagues tomorrow. So far, I've finished (all homemade): strawberry jam, grape jelly, molasses spice cookies, and snickerdoodles. Tonight, I'm making homemade caramel corn with peanuts, chocolate covered oreos, and maybe homemade bread. Everything needs to be finished tonight so that I can deliver the goods tomorrow. I wanted to do more, but I just didn't have the time. There's always next year, right?

I'd better get back to work...

Gifts

I've been off from school since Monday, but have to go back on the 21st & 22nd for finals. I thought I'd spend my week baking and getting ready for the holidays, but that hasn't happened. I've been reading, napping, shopping a little...really not productive at all.

My mom came over today, and we made a batch of grape jelly (from juice, not fruit). It's setting (I hope) on the counter right now. If it turns out yummy, I'll post the recipe. I'm going to make strawberry jam, and maybe blueberry jam tonight. Tomorrow will be spent (really) baking cookies. I want to have everything finished so that I can deliver stuff on Monday.

I have an OB appointment that I need to get ready for. I don't feel like venturing outside, though. Very cold today.

Just not into it...

Today is the last day for my Tuesday/Thursday classes. I should be excited. I should go in there and wow them one last time before the final exam. But I just don't have the energy. It could be that I haven't been sleeping well (leg cramps, the constant need to pee, kicking baby), but I'm beginning to suspect that I'm just tired of teaching. That's something I thought I'd never say. And I hope it's not true.

Slowly but steadily, the desire to own my own farm has been creeping to the forefront. I want to be more self-sufficient. Instead of teaching today, I'd much rather stay home today and bake some bread from scratch. I'm not great at it, but I want to perfect it. I want to start going through my seed catalogs and plan next year's garden. But I'll go in and learn 'em.

Food, Inc.

*sigh*

We watched Food, Inc. last night. For those of you who haven't seen it, whether you care about where your food comes from or not (though, you really should care), see it ASAP. It's out on DVD after a limited release in theaters.

The movie, with contributors like Michael Pollan, Eric Schlosser and Joel Salatin, examines the US food system, and how we've moved so far away from the agrarian society we were when the US came into existence. Only a few companies control the thousands of products we find on supermarket shelves. The animals we eat are treated horribly, bred to fatten up so quickly that they can't move or stand up, and are fed things that go against their nature. Seed companies like Monsanto forbid farmers from doing what they've done forever -- save seeds. Farmers today are not free to farm. Laws, supported by the large corporations like Monsanto, forbid them from growing certain things, or selling certain things, etc.

I went to bed feeling guilty last night, knowing that even though I have a desire to grow/raise my own food, I'm a slacker. It's much easier to go to the grocery store, buy what's in sale, ignore the seasonality of produce, and be on my merry way. It's cheaper to buy the factory farmed meat than it is to buy local organic, humanely raised meat. Though, when I've tried to source local organic meat in the past, it's been difficult, even though I live in the Garden State. Even the farmer's markets and stands around here sell non-local produce year-round.

I need to do better. Make the effort, and stop contributing to the factory farm system.

More later...