Monday, September 27, 2010

Monday Slump

I've been awake for almost 8 hours and I don't feel like I've accomplished anything. I've been grading discussion boards (so tedious!) for my online course all day. I had a craving for molasses, so I whipped up a batch of molasses crumb muffins.

I hate waiting for responses to job applications. Every time my cell phone has rung today, I got a pit in my stomach, afraid/hoping it would be the CC I sent my CV to last night. Because, of course, they would read it first thing this morning and need to call me right away before another college snatched me up. Right.

I think I've been having a difficult time lately because of the change of seasons. The weather hasn't changed that much (though today it's rainy and in the 60's), but the end of summer makes me sad. I'm going to miss the sunshine, fresh produce, not having to bundle up under layers of clothing, and mowing the lawn. I spent most of the summer holed up in the house being a mom, but still there was the possibility of having fun. My fall and spring semesters are filled with work, work, work.

Speaking of work, I'd better get back to the boards.

Sunday, September 26, 2010

Almost October? Geez...

I swear, I've written hundreds of blog posts in my mind, but I rarely get the chance to sit down and type them out. My boys are visiting with my in-laws this afternoon, so I actually have a couple of hours to myself.

I'm still struggling with balancing my time between work, motherhood, home-stuff, and myself. I get maybe an hour or two a week completely to myself. It's really not enough for everything I want to do. I'm constantly on alert, waiting for The Kid to need something, even when The Husband is taking care of him. I really need to learn how to relax because my blood pressure is way up, and I don't want to take medication. And I want to relax!

I'm applying for a full-time tenure-track position at an area community college. I haven't taught there, but I've been there for conferences, and they are light years ahead of where I currently teach. They're larger, and they have more funding. I would still love to land a FT gig at my current college, but they won't be hiring an English prof until maybe 2012. I've been adjuncting for about five years now, and it's time I land a FT position. That said, I'm nervous about it because of The Kid. Right now, I'm only on campus two days a week for four hours each day. I'm not sure how I would handle FT work, but I guess I'll deal with that hurdle if it comes.

The past month has gone by in a blur. My days are filled with prepping for classes, grading, playing with The Kid, changing diapers, cooking, etc. I haven't really read anything, which is adding to my irritability, I'm sure. I really need to make more time to read.

I'm also very, very tired. The Kid generally sleeps from 10-5:30, but he rarely makes it the entire night in his crib. I'm not sure why, but he wakes up during the night and just wants to be held. I can't deal with letting him cry it out, so we end up sleeping in the recliner in the living room. I love the cuddling, but the interrupted sleep is killing me. I'm tired all the time, and it's making me sick. I had strep last week, and I feel a cold coming on now. Not good.

With that in mind, I'm going to set aside the work and take a nap.