More Thinking Than Doing

I think a lot. I can't seem to stop. Often, I get so stuck thinking that I don't do what think about doing. For example, I want to bake something today, but I've spent the past hour trying to decide what I want to make instead of just doing it. The Kid will wake up from his nap soon, and I certainly won't be able to bake then. So, I've essentially wasted my time. I think part of the problem is that I'm so tired, I just don't want to move.

I read a lot about homesteading, cooking from scratch, simplifying, etc. and I want to do it all. But I don't. I reach for easy meals, still lust after material items (books and bags, mostly), and didn't prepare the ground for a garden like I wanted to. If I would have spent less time thinking and reading about it, and more time doing, I'd be on my way to the simple life I want.

I'm also worried because I don't have any classes for next summer. I wanted to teach at least one online course so that I'd have income, but the new Dept. Chair didn't give me anything. So, I'm not sure what I'm going to do. Ugh.

The Kid is starting to stir, so I'm going to throw in a load of laundry and prepare myself for playing and cuddling with him.

Sunday night blahs...

I'm too tired and crabby for a real post, so here are some random things:

• Friday -- Had my usual exam meeting with Dr. E. Dazzled her with my brilliant insights (yes, that's what she called them) on Plath.
  Afterward, I went to my parents' to scope out the garden. Had S'mores with Mom, Dad, and Jamie. Really good times, and I was happy. It was so nice to just relax. I really adore my parents.
  

• Racing -- Last night did not go as planned. Does it ever, though? Didn't qualify in the heat, so had to go to the B. Had a great run, finished 2nd. I was happy that we qualified simply because it meant we'd go home with more than $50 in tow money. In the feature, however, our friend spun, and Jamie, who was behind him, had nowhere to go. Of course, it happened right in front of us -- good because we could at least see right away that Jamie was OK, but bad because...well, it pretty much sucks seeing your car getting wrecked no matter where it happens. We just seem to have the crappiest luck, and it's so frustrating. But I know that Jamie will get a win or two this season. I mean, we have to get a break eventually, right?

• Garden -- My parents have tilled up a huge plot for our garden. I'm really excited. For the past couple of years, I've tried to garden here, but my yard is so shady, and the soil is horrible. I tried container gardening, but I just didn't get the yields I wanted. But this year, I'm doing most of my gardening at my parents'. I have big, big plans involving tons of organic veggies...I can't wait to get started! I really just want to simplify my life, and get to a point where I grow my own food. I've written about all this before -- grand plans of living off the land, sewing my own clothes, etc -- but I've never followed through. I have to start taking baby steps, though...right?
  

OK. I'm going to try to do something productive before I go to bed.